I assume delivering a baby is a scary thing for all familes and it was no different for us. We knew from pretty early in the pregnancy that we were probably going to have a difficult situation on our hands when our second trimester ultrasound showed a little giant growing. I remember at about 22 weeks, we found out that Owen was measuring approximately 2-3 weeks larger than was "normal" and one doctor said I was carrying a "bruiser." This appointment was quickly followed by an unpleasant diagnosis of gestational diabetes combined with my blood pressure increasing steadily from appointment to appointment and this question "Did anyone ever tell you that you have high blood pressure?" I spent 10 weeks stabbing myself in the finger up to 4 times a day to monitor my blood sugars and Matt spent it trying to find low-carb options for me to fulfill cravings and get enough to eat without triggering a diabetic reaction. I went through some difficult days as I tried to understand my diet rules and alternating between not eating enough and feeling weak and sick or just kind of sick. It was no fun! At the same time I could hardly walk some days, let alone get shoes on over my hugely swollen (and painful!) feet. I know most women's feet swell up in the last trimester, but the high blood pressure was really kicking in and my legs and feet were twice their normal size. I started going to the doctor at least twice a week (but usually three times) to have my blood pressure and the baby's heartbeat checked.
Between Week 34 and Week 35 the doctors started to tell me it could be any day now...any day and I might get admitted for my high blood pressure, which would most likely mean having a baby. We thought "But we still have 6 weeks to go!" We were nervous and scared for Owen and what it would mean to be born that early and hoped that his ever-increasing size would also mean he was well-developed and ready to survive in the world, but we were nervous and worried. My parents even came out for a week after a doctor's appointment when they told me they would be surprised if I made it another week without my blood pressure escalating to "must deliver" status...but I held steady for two more weeks!
On August 3, 2011 (37 weeks, 3 days), we woke up as normal. I was pretty uncomfortable and we went through our morning routine, but Matt went to work and I didn't because we had a doctor's appointment and I didn't feel well. We met at the hospital for a routine, scheduled appointment at 10:00am where we knew we would have another ultrasound (the best part of all the complications was that we got to have about 4 more ultrasounds that normal!) to check Owen's growth and discuss our delivery options - natural or c-section. When I got my blood pressure checked, it was 155/105 and when we met with the doctor, she told us I would be admitted to the hospital. Luckily, we had packed our bags the week prior because we had been told "any day now"...unluckily, neither of us really thought I'd get admitted that morning. They went ahead and did another ultrasound to estimate Owen's size and weight in order for the doctor's to make a delivery decision and came up with him at approximately 8 lbs 14 oz. This was right on the line of what the doctors considered healthy to attempt natural delivery, but it was still our choice what to do. She told us to take a minute and think about it and then walk down the hall to have a baby...either way, we were not leaving the hospital today. Talk about a shocker! Luckily, through all the discomfort and health issues that seemed to pop up for me did not affect the health of Owen, just me.
We went out into the hall and called our parents. I called to ask my mom what to do and we decided the smart thing to do in order to prevent potential complications for Owen and me during delivery was to go with a c-section delivery. I was a wreck! I was going to walk through that door and had no idea what was going to happen once I was in there! I tried to be calm and talk to Matt about the things we needed from the house when he went back for our bags, but ended up crying in the waiting room. This wasn't what it was supposed to be like, right?
We went in to Labor and Delivery at Wilford Hall Medical Center at about 11:30 and they said "I'll show you to your room" and took us right back. It was so strange - we'd visited people there before and held their babies and given them presents, but it was like I couldn't register the fact that we were going to stay there now. The main doctor,Dr. Porter, came in with a small entourage (it's a teaching hospital) and talked with us about having a baby. Dr. Porter told us that although some doctor's would attempt to deliver first, she preferred to opt for c-section from the start because of all the complications associated with a larger baby and that we could get into an emergency c-section situation which is overall much scarier and difficult for everyone. After that, Matt and I felt confident that c-section was the way to go even though I was terrified.
They told me since I had last eaten around 9, we could get ready for surgery around 3:30. We were in shock that it would be that soon! We thought maybe later that night or first thing in the morning, that there would be time to get used to the idea, maybe take some last pictures for before and after. But nope, we were going to meet Owen in 3 hours or so! We discussed the basic details and the doctor told Matt to go get our bags and get something to eat, there was plenty of time. So...Matt left and stopped for a nice, big burrito from FreeBirds and then headed home to get our bags. During this time, things moved very quickly at the hospital - the techs came in and got me dressed in a hospital gown and put two IVs in me, one in each arm, I signed all the paperwork for surgery and anesthesia. And then a doctor came in and said, "How do you feel about 2 o'clock? For delivery?" I thought, "Um, where is my husband?" and told him, "Well, my husband isn't back yet," and started to cry. They told me they would wait for him, of course, and not to worry. I called Matt and asked through clenched teeth, "Where are you?" and he told me he hadn't even gotten to the house yet! I started to panic a little inside, but didn't want him to get into an accident because he was driving crazy to get back to the hospital so I tried to stay calm and explained to him what the doctor had said.
Eventually, Matt got back and they handed him a set of scrubs right away and finished getting me ready for surgery. Sometime around 2:30 they came in to wheel me back to the operating room. Matt had to stay outside on a little bench until everything was ready in the operating room. I remember feeling so scared about the epidural and tried to breathe and not cry or shake too much because I didn't want to mess up and get a big needle in the wrong part of my back! A really sweet little intern held my hand and helped me breathe. The anesthesiologist was really great and talked me through everything from the epidural to the end of the surgery. Eventually, they brough Matt in and he sat down by my head. He told me "I love you so much" and I told him "I. Can't. Really. Talk. Right. Now" because I thought I was going to burst into tears...I have no words for the fear that I felt during those moments. Wondering what was about to happen, would I feel it, would the baby be okay, and a hundred other thoughts going through my mind. I remember feeling like I was not really there and don't remember much of the actual surgery, partly because of the magnesium sulphate they gave me pre-delivery (to control my blood pressure but made me feel hot, nauseous, and loopy) and partly because I was so anxious. Matt and the anesthesiologist talked to me and I could hear the doctors talking every now and then, "Making the incision" or "Looks good" and then the anesthesiologist told us "There's the head. It won't be long now." I remember feeling like I was holding my breath and then I heard Owen cry and I let out a sigh (more like a gasp) of relief. My world opened up on August 3, 2011 at 3:25pm.
They came and got Matt for him to cut the umbilical cord and they brought Owen over for me to see. I couldn't move my arms but I got to see him for a second before they took him and Matt back to the room. I remember being so relieved that the baby was okay and I didn't really care what else was going on. It took a long time for them to finish the surgery after the boys left...it was much longer to put things back together than to take it apart. They wheeled me down to recovery where I was told I'd stay for about an hour, just until I could move my legs. I think it was about 4:20 and I didn't get to see the boys again until anout 8:30 that night. I had some excessive shaking and hemorrhaging.
While I was in recovery, I remember drifting in and out of sleep and not being able to hold a cup when the nurse tried to give me water. I remember feeling really cold and shaking a lot even though I couldn't feel my legs at all. I remember her calling down and different doctors coming down to check on me and getting different medications. Eventually, it was the anesthesiologist who came down and had the magic touch. He gave me some medication and sat with me until the shaking stopped. After that I was able to focus a little bit better and tried to concentrate on moving my legs so I could go upstairs and see Owen and Matt. They had told both of us I'd be in recovery for about an hour so while I was downstairs feeling numb and scared, Matt was upstairs taking care of Owen and feeling worried too. The whole time I had three main thoughts 1. Is the baby okay? 2. I hope Matt is okay and not worrying too much. 3. I think there might be something wrong with me. Am I going to be okay?
When they finally cleared me to go upstairs I was so relieved but also feeling very weak and nervous. They took me to the room and helped me get cleaned up and situated and then brought the boys in to be with me. I still didn't know if Owen was doing well or had any problems, etc. I finally got to hold Owen for the first time around 9pm that night but couldn't hold him for long because I knew I was still pretty weak and out of it. It was amazing and I remember asking Matt "Is he okay? Nothing's wrong with him? How much does he weigh?" And Matt told me about the first 5 hours of Owen's life, about the first diaper change and getting peed on! My parents had jumped into their car and drove three hours to the Seattle airport and jumped on a plane almost right after I called my mom earlier. They arrived around midnight to meet Owen and he slept through most of it.
Eventually they came to give me some more magnesium sulphate that I had to stay on for 24 hours, which made me pretty sick and meant I was bed-ridden until my blood pressure and kidney function stablized. I wasn't able to help much with my little Owie while we were in the hospital or even the first week at home. Because I was bed-ridden, getting up and walking around for the first time was really difficult. I couldn't stand by myself at first and had to be extra careful when I was helping with Owen. It was hard not to be able to help him when he cried, but with the help of Matt and my parents, we made it through those 3 and a half days at the hospital.
